Grandmother

A few weeks ago I saw comedian, Kate Clinton, and she mentioned how it is so interesting that when people are complaining about the possible health care program, they are saying that it will put grandma to death - not grandpa. When I write this, it doesn’t seem funny because I am not a comic but I laughed very hard as did BK because I have been noticing this for years.

If some woman gets hurt and she is above a certain age – maybe 60 – the paper or the TV states that a 65 year old grandmother was run over by a car today. The question in my mind was whether that was a worse because she was a grandmother or why is that relevant at all. A 75 year old grandmother slipped off the brake and onto the gas pedal going into a store front. An 80+ man drove into a farmer’s market. Was he a grandfather? It wasn’t mentioned. A 55 year old grandmother robbed a bank – isn’t that cute or a shock that a grandmother would do that? I love being a grandmother. I have been a grandmother since I was 43 years old. I wonder if I would have been described as a 43 year old grandmother if I had done something newsworthy.

All this has again come to mind, as it does almost daily to this 70 year old grandmother, when I read in the USA Today about the H1N1 vaccine. It is not going to be given to the elderly because we may have an immunity sine we may have been exposed in our younger years. A question was asked if the clinics will turn away elderly people who want the shot. Dr. Anthony Fauci answered, “But I have to tell you, I can't imagine if a 75-year-old grandmother comes up to a place and says, "I'd like my vaccine," that somebody will say, "No, go away and come back in two weeks." Somehow I don't see that.” So, if you want a H1N1 shot, stand in line with your grandchildren and be a woman and who would ever turn you down.

My sister and I were dancing at a wedding not long ago, doing what we used to call the jitterbug which is now called swing dancing. We had a great time when after the dance was over, someone came to me laughing and said, “That was the cutest thing I have ever seen.” I was deeply offended. This person had been to other weddings and my sister and I almost always dance the jitterbug together. This time we were “cute.” Why? Because we are old? I guess we could have been described as the 64 and 69 year old grandmothers who were jitterbugging. Oh, wait – my sister isn’t a grandmother. Does that make her any less cute? The interesting part of this is that we are considered “cute” when we are children and cute when we are old. I resent being considered the same as a child.

So, notice how many times an older woman is called a grandmother even though that has no relevance to the subject. Or how many times people, in particular politicians, use the term “grandmother” when trying to get across a point. And also notice how many times you consider older people as cute rather than talented or smart or energetic.